Why I Chose Escort Services over Casual Dating

If it was up to me, I’d recommend escort services or an erotic massage, especially if you just need something casual with no strings attached. Let’s be real for a second, dating in the 21st century is pretty much like trying to find a decent avocado at the grocery store. You know, 90% of the time, it’s either too hard, too mushy, or, surprise! Rotten inside. So after all these years of casual dating, I finally reached that earth-shattering realization: maybe it’s not me, it’s them. After navigating through the dating world, for far too long, I decided to go to a different root. Voilà, the epiphany: escort services. Honestly, It’s been a game-changer! 

Read More: Who Are Escorts? Understanding the Profession in Nigeria

Before you judge, hear me out. Casual dating had its moments, sure. But for every single romantic sunset, there were at least three awkward “So, what are we?” conversations or “Would you love me if I was a tree?” kinda delusional questions. And let’s not forget the countless months of scrolling, swiping, texting, ghosting, and being ghosted. Ah, the thrill of a modern love! Where people vanish like Snapchat streaks. I’d have bought a theme park ticket if I wanted such an emotional rollercoaster. At least that wouldn’t involve broken hearts and crushed feelings!  Casual dating has to have the dreaded small talk like “So, what do you do for fun?” and the dance of trying to figure out if the other person is looking for something serious or if they’re just as emotionally unavailable as you are.

Then came the turnaround point, I usually refer to it as “the journey to sanity preservation”. Yeah, you heard that right. Why you ask? Keep reading. So one day, I was on a date, for a whole hour, yapped about their conspiracy theories involving pigeons being government drones (yes, I know! Really?). Trust me, I’ve had more thrilling conversations with my tax advisor that just having this random conversation with a stranger who doesn’t even care if I ate before getting here or I walked to the meet-up point. So I just sat and listened anyway and somewhere between “The Earth Is Flat” and “Bill Gates Controls the Weather,” that’s when it hit me, there had to be a better way.  There has to be! And Boom: Welcome to the world of escort services. The discretion in booking an escort in Nigeria online or an erotic massage is heavenly.

What did I find there? Predictability, professionalism, and, uh! actual enjoyment! No emotional games, nor them second-guessing if I was too “emotionally unavailable” whatever that means. I haven’t mentioned how I could experience sexual fantasies, try out different experiences, Uh! Just what I needed and yes, I know you think I’m a psycho but trust me, I AM NOT! I just want different. Escort services are like ordering in a five-star dinner with the exact menu you wanted. No weird surprises. No forced small talk about alien invasions. Just pure, unfiltered satisfaction. Ecstatic!

Now, some might say, “But what about the connection?” Well, let’s break that down. Casual dating has connections, sure! But it’s mostly me connecting the dots on why I’m not hearing from them after a great night out. But with escorts, I know exactly where I stand. It’s transactional, yes, but free from the murky waters of modern romance, too. And the conversation? 10/10. I’ve had more meaningful discussions with escorts than I ever did with Jojo from Tinder who wants girlfriend allowances but can’t cook cause of her nails. And, of course, the time factor. Casual dating eats up your time like Netflix on a Sunday when you are too lazy. With escort services, there is a schedule: start time, end time everybody’s happy. It is like the Uber of romance. You get in, you get where you need to go, and poof, you’re out.

Why did I choose escort services over casual dating? Well, because I like my sanity intact, my time spent accordingly, and let’s be frank, the thought of experiencing different escorts every time is it for me. They keep me satisfied. No situationship-type drama attached. Plus, no one has ever made me question the existence of birds. That’s a plus if you ask me.

Just So You Know: The 14 Types of Escorts in Nigeria You Should Know